Mis+ress – self-titled
3.21.18 by Ryan Masteller

I stuffed a towel in the drain of my kitchen sink, turned on the faucet, and lay down flat on the tile floor. Mis+ress’s self-titled tape for Somewhere Cold Records piped in from the other room. I remained there until my entire house filled up with water, and I was immersed in it, floating gently via some mystery current. Turns out the current was the flow of the water as it emptied through my open front door, where my wife was standing, incredulous. My house was ruined. My wife was pissed.

I’d also ruined my Mis+ress tape in the process.

You may be wondering why I’d take such stupid and expensive measures to listen to a cassette tape, but we writers for Tabs Out have a code: Let the sounds that emanate forth guide your actions in preparing for the maximum possible effect. I’m paraphrasing, but Article 16, Section 111.B.61 of the Tabs Out Handbook is pretty clear about following your gut on this tape-listening stuff. With Mis+ress, there was nothing I could do but immerse myself under water, what with the gorgeous ambient guitar, the fullness of the effected tones, and the sheer tranquility of even compositions. A physical reaction of sheer bliss coursed through my bloodstream while listening, and I had to get all amniotic in response. My house just happened to be a casualty.

There are those of you who are probably wondering why I didn’t just relax on a couch, or if I really had to be immersed in water, why couldn’t I have done it in the bathtub? I would answer that if you’re asking that question, then you just don’t understand.

Mis+ress is Brian Wenckebach “of Brooklyn shoegaze darlings Elika and experimental electronica outfit Thee Koukouvaya. He’s worked with a number of established artists and labels including Showtime Television Networks, Polyvinyl Records, Ulrich Schnauss, Asobi Seksu, Noveller, Thisquietarmy, and Nadja. This album was recorded with an electric guitar and four effects pedals in his sister-in-law’s childhood bedroom in Toms River, New Jersey.”

The self-titled tape comes in an edition of 50 from Somewhere Cold Records, and you should buy the tape, because the digital version costs $1,000 (I’m serious)! … I accidentally bought the digital version, which sucks because I have a lot of damage to repair here. ☹